Friends,
In this post, I try to present one of my Malayalam stories in English. The Malayalam version is available here.
Eventually, our longtime romance met success. The wedding took place with the blessing of either families and relatives. The pleasure was unprecedented and it was like we entered in the heaven alive. Even though our hearts were unified each other since the beginning of the love itself, we also attached physically each other after the marriage. We missed each other even for a short-while of separations. The world we found, has been transformed to a garden filled with wonderfully blossomed flowers. All the surroundings like the coolness of rain, romantic appearance of moonlit nights and the golden shining of sunlight days conveyed us miraculous feelings of illusions. We were literally enjoying the sweet dreams of honeymoon.
Being a woman, my natural desire for fondling my own baby was temporarily pointless due to our meaningless fear of hurdle to the comfortable stay in honeymoon. We were blinded enough even not to imagine such an irritating break for that paradise only because of a newcomer. We could not even think of sharing ourselves with a third one then even if it is a part of us. Yet, I got unexpectedly conceived since his mental control was surrendering to the extreme emotions of some ecstatic moments
The anxiety of losing the comfort was more than enough to make us crazy. We grew furious to the entire world. A pregnancy and delivery will certainly derail the pleasures of honeymoon. Nothing to rethink. Rushed to hospital. When the family doctor refused to forget his ethics, We ran for a costlier deal, and compromised with another physician. We were insanely looking for the ways to maintain the honeymoon status for some more years. We went with our plans and we paid for getting our unborn destroyed without thinking for a second time. At last, the atrocity we made reality. We stabbed our unborn baby in to death brutally in the womb!
Decades passed. Solitude hits me. That abortion reduced my womb to a mere piece of flesh. I swam across the ocean of sorrows because of the isolation gifted me by that incident. I have never been blessed with another child again. My husband had already started making his own choices to ensure the continuity of his clan. I have still been melting with deep regret and desperation.
Oh my dear child, I denied your right to be born. I denied your right to feel the wonderful miracles of the universe. Your fondly face extinguishes the tiny flames of peace and calmness of my heart. Won't you forgive my serious sin since I have passed rest of the life through miserable paths only because the cruelty I did on you!
In this post, I try to present one of my Malayalam stories in English. The Malayalam version is available here.
Eventually, our longtime romance met success. The wedding took place with the blessing of either families and relatives. The pleasure was unprecedented and it was like we entered in the heaven alive. Even though our hearts were unified each other since the beginning of the love itself, we also attached physically each other after the marriage. We missed each other even for a short-while of separations. The world we found, has been transformed to a garden filled with wonderfully blossomed flowers. All the surroundings like the coolness of rain, romantic appearance of moonlit nights and the golden shining of sunlight days conveyed us miraculous feelings of illusions. We were literally enjoying the sweet dreams of honeymoon.
Being a woman, my natural desire for fondling my own baby was temporarily pointless due to our meaningless fear of hurdle to the comfortable stay in honeymoon. We were blinded enough even not to imagine such an irritating break for that paradise only because of a newcomer. We could not even think of sharing ourselves with a third one then even if it is a part of us. Yet, I got unexpectedly conceived since his mental control was surrendering to the extreme emotions of some ecstatic moments
The anxiety of losing the comfort was more than enough to make us crazy. We grew furious to the entire world. A pregnancy and delivery will certainly derail the pleasures of honeymoon. Nothing to rethink. Rushed to hospital. When the family doctor refused to forget his ethics, We ran for a costlier deal, and compromised with another physician. We were insanely looking for the ways to maintain the honeymoon status for some more years. We went with our plans and we paid for getting our unborn destroyed without thinking for a second time. At last, the atrocity we made reality. We stabbed our unborn baby in to death brutally in the womb!
Decades passed. Solitude hits me. That abortion reduced my womb to a mere piece of flesh. I swam across the ocean of sorrows because of the isolation gifted me by that incident. I have never been blessed with another child again. My husband had already started making his own choices to ensure the continuity of his clan. I have still been melting with deep regret and desperation.
Oh my dear child, I denied your right to be born. I denied your right to feel the wonderful miracles of the universe. Your fondly face extinguishes the tiny flames of peace and calmness of my heart. Won't you forgive my serious sin since I have passed rest of the life through miserable paths only because the cruelty I did on you!
